The mayor of the coastal town of Huarmey in Peru told a crowd that he was concerned their tap water contained dangerously high levels of strontium — a metal which he claimed reduces male hormones, increasing the risk of homosexuality among those who drink it.
Rumors of gay-making tap water have surfaced in Peru before: In 2000, a TV news report claimed that water from the town of Tabalosos — the source of Huarmey’s water — had caused all 14,000 of its male residents to be gay. But wait! Before you book an Atlantis cruise to Huarmey, you should know the report was a complete myth. (Tabalosos only has four gay guys, and they’ve all slept with each other and are sick of running into one another on Peruvian Grindr.)
Huarmey Mayor Jose Benitez wasn’t aware of that, apparently, and used that report as the basis for his warning:
“Unfortunately strontium reduces male hormones and suddenly we’ll be as Tabalosos, as other towns, where the percentages are increasing of homosexuality. Young people have low self-esteem by this stigma.”
Silly mayor. There’s only one colorless liquid that can turn a straight guy gay: vodka.